“Baby” Octopus Duo

In love, you have loosened yourself like seawater.
~Pablo Neruda

From the from Greek ὀκτάπους (oktapous, “eight-footed”), the octopus is a cephalopod mollusk of the order Octopoda that inhabits diverse reaches of the ocean, including coral reefs, pelagic waters, and the sea floor.

There are some 300 species of these complex, supremely intelligent creatures — thought to be the Einsteins of invertebrates. These species are divided into two groups, the Cirrina and the Incirrina. The Cirrina are characterized by having two fins on their head, a small internal shell, and cirri, small cilia-like filaments on their arms with a pair of cirri adjacent to each sucker. The Incirrina, the benthic octopuses and argonauts, include many of the better known species, most of which are bottom dwellers.

All have two keen eyes one of which is dominant, four pairs of sensitive, neuron laden arms with dexterous suction cups that taste as well as feel, three hearts with two pumping blood to the gills while a third circulates it to the rest of the body, and a beak that exudes neurotoxins. As a species, octopuses are bilaterally symmetric meaning they can be divided into roughly mirror image halves. Researchers are becoming convinced that these boneless, ancient creatures have developed intellect, emotion, and personality. Even a sense of cephalopod consciousness.

Octopus have relatively short life spans ranging from 6 months to 5 years. But, it should be remembered that coitus is lethal, a direct cause of octopus demise as most males only survive for a few months after mating, and females die shortly after their eggs hatch (following a brief bout with senility). What a Hobson’s choice: live a longer, celibate life or copulate and die sooner?

Octopuses, octopi, octopodes have uncanny methods of escape. Mimicry and camouflage are aided by chameleonic skin cells which change the colors, opacity, textures, pigments and reflectiveness of their epidermis. Shifting shapes and changing hues, they adroitly merge into their surroundings, hidden from predators. Other times, octopi flee rapidly by propulsion ejecting a thick, blackish ink in a large melanin cloud which actually reduces the efficacy of their predators’ olfactory organs. Since they have no internal or external shell or bones, they can manipulate their body to fit into bizzarely minute crevices. Finally, they can sever appendages as a self-defense mechanism designed to elude a predator’s grasp, and the lost body part may be regenerated later.

Despite the suggestion, baby octopus are not the young of adults. Rather, they are full grown, mature critters which are just a diminutive species.

PREP(S)

If the octopus is frozen, defrost thoroughly.

Should the octopus still have their heads, remove and discard the head or clean the inside of the head and discard the beak. Either sever and discard the heads or keep them attached. If you choose to keep the head on, however, make sure it is cleaned out by making a shallow cut along the head, being careful not to cut too deep and puncture the innards, then carefully but firmly pull out everything inside -or- cut the head off, turn it inside out and use a paring knife to scrape away the innards. Clearer heads prevail here.

If a small black, triangular beak does not come out along with everything else, then insert your finger up through the middle of the body and push it out or extract it. Rinse the octopus well under cold water and set aside.

GRILLED BABY OCTOPUS & LEMON VINAIGRETTE

2 lbs baby octopus

Marinade
1/2 C olive oil
Juice of 1 lemon
4 plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and finely chopped
8 sprigs of fresh thyme
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

Vinaigrette
1 C extra virgin olive oil
2 T fresh lemon juice
1 T white wine vinegar
1 T Dijon mustard
2 t fresh rosemary leaves, minced
1 T plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and finely minced
1/2 t honey
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

Finish
Grated fresh lemon peel
Chopped flat leaf parsley
Artisanal bread slices, grilled or toasted
Garlic head or tomato, sliced transversely

Vigorously whisk all vinaigrette ingredients in a glass bowl to blend. Season with salt and pepper to your liking, then set aside. This can be done the day before.

In a large, heavy pot over high heat, bring water to a boil. Turn the heat off and dump the octopus into the pot. Allow to poach for one minute then drain immediately through a colander. Rinse with cold water and dry well on towels.

Whisk together the marinade ingredients and combine with the octopi in a large, heavy plastic bag, then seal. Refrigerate for at least 4 hours, preferably overnight.

Remove octopus and allow to reach room temperature. Soak wooden skewers in water. Meanwhile, heat grill to medium high. Consider placing some fresh rosemary sprigs in the fire just before grilling. Skewer a few octopus on each skewer, and then grill about 3 minutes per side, turning once.

Remove from the grill, drizzle with the vinaigrette to your liking and top with grated lemon peel and chopped parsley. Serve over grilled bread slices which have been brushed with olive oil and rubbed with an open head of garlic or fresh tomato before placing on the grill.

KOREAN GRILLED BABY OCTOPUS (JJUKKUMI GUI)

2 lbs baby octopus

Marinade
1/3 C ssamjang (bean and chili paste)
2 T kochujang (chili paste)
3 t gochugaru (red pepper flakes)
2 T shoyu (soy sauce)
2 T mirin
1 T sherry vinegar
1 T canola oil
1/3 C honey
4 plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and minced
1 t fresh ginger, finely grated
2 T sesame oil

Finish
English cucumber, peeled and cut into julienne strips or thinly sliced into disks
2 T white sesame seeds, toasted

Whisk together the marinade ingredients and then pour over the octopus and mix to coat well in a large, heavy plastic bag. Seal, then marinate for 4 hours, preferably overnight, in the fridge. Remove the octopus and allow to reach room temperature. Heat a charcoal grill to medium high and cook for about 3 minutes per side, turning once. Serve promptly strewn with the cucumber strips or slices and sprinkled with sesame seeds.

Pourboire: Grill temperature is best assessed by using the traditional hand test. Hold your open hand, palm down, about three inches above the hot grate with the coals already spread and count how long you can keep it there before the pain demands you retract it — for medium high, about 2-3 seconds.

April & Asparagi alla Milanese (Asparagus Milanese)

What’s in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet.
~William Shakespeare

The sometimes dubious origin of a month’s name. April is the season of spring in the Northern hemisphere and autumn in the Southern hemisphere.

The Roman calendar changed several times between the founding and the fall of the Roman Empire. Prior to the addition of January and February by Numa Pompilius around 700 BCE, April was the second month of the Roman calendar year with March being the first. The city grew briskly, swelled by landless refugees. So, as most were male and unmarried, the then king Romulus (a character of Rome’s founding myth, and one of the twin sons of Rhea Silvia and Mars who were cast into the river Tiber) arranged to abduct neighboring Sabine women. Of Sabine blood, his successor Numa, who was a wise even cunning leader but lived an austere life, was the legendary second king of Rome.

Romans considered odd numbers to be lucky, so Numa plucked one day from each of the six months with 30 days, reducing the number of days in the previously defined months. Then, around 450 BCE, the month of April slipped into the fourth slot and was assigned a mere 29 days. With the introduction of the Gregorian calendar by a similarly named pope in 1582, another day was added et voilà “30 days hath April,” as does September, June and November.

Though April’s derivation is not certain, a common theory is that the name is rooted in the Latin Aprilis which is derived from the Latin aperire meaning “to open” — perhaps referring to blossoming petals and buds. This coincides not only seasonally but etymologically with the modern Greek use of ἁνοιξις (opening) for the word spring. Others posit that since months are often named for gods and goddesses and Aphrilis is derived from the Greek Aphrodite, one could surmise that the month was named for the Greek goddess of love.

The month of April begins on the same day of the week as July each year, and January in leap years; while it ends on the same day of the week as December every year.

Around the 5th century CE, the Anglo-Saxons referred to the month of April as Oster-monath or Eostre-monath, a reference to the goddess Eostre, whose feast occurred during this month. Saint Bede (a/k/a The Venerable Bede), a learned monk from the Northumbrian monastery of Saint Peter, believed this gave root to the word Easter which is often observed then.

Bunches of jaunty green asparagus are harbingers in farmers’ markets signalling that winter has finally given way to spring.

ASPARAGI ALLA MILANESE (ASPARAGUS MILANESE)

Cold water
Sea salt
Medium asparagus spears, tough ends trimmed off

Unsalted butter
Extra-virgin olive oil
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
4 large, farm fresh eggs

Parmigiano-reggiano, grated
Lemon zest

Bring a large pot with cold water to a boil. Add the sea salt and then asparagus and cook until crisp, about 4 minutes. Drain and divide the spears evenly among smaller plates or platters. Tent loosely with foil.

Heat a heavy, large non-stick skillet over medium. Heat butter and a splash of olive oil until just lightly shimmering. But, please do not burn or brown the butter. While the fat melts, crack eggs into a glass cup or saucer then slide them into the shimmering oil. Cover with a clear domed lid and adjust the heat so that the white begins to set. Begin spooning the heated fats over the eggs until the runny whites turn opaque and the yolks begin to set ever so slightly, but remain rather runny. (The white no longer clear and the yolk still loose.) Remove to a plate by simply sliding them out of the pan or use a slotted spatula. Place the egg over the bottom half of the cooked asparagus spears, and then season with salt and pepper to your liking.

Grate parmigiano-reggiano over each serving, along with some lemon zest. Serve promptly. (It is nearly peerless when that orange yolk quietly oozes onto the eagerly awaiting grassy flavored spears.)

Ampersands & Chocolate Chip Cookies

Never ruin an apology with an excuse.
~Benjamin Franklin

My failure not to write here for a short while was not inadvertent. Over the last several months, I have been poring over texts, tomes, papers, memoirs, etc., while my fingers have been pecking feverishly on another project. So, a tad bleary eyed and a bit weary handed with little mention made of a littered mind & brain — time just did not permit work on both. My brief leave should not suggest that our kitchen went fallow, though. To the contrary, creative yet humble eats (sometimes at strange hours) have been the rule in this urban galley. My apologies to you readers. Enough said?

The ampersand emerged in the first century from the Latin word et meaning and, ultimately giving rise to the ampersand shape. Latin cursive scribes often connected the two letters “e” and “t” to form a ligature. In the more flowing New Roman cursive, ligatures became quite routine. However, with the development of Carolingian script in the 9th century the use of ligatures began to diminish even though the “e” + “t” continued to flourish, becoming even more stylized and less revealing of its origins.

Fanciful versions of the ampersand abound. For instance, the Frenchman Claude Garamond’s 16th century character depicted a clear indication of the form’s Latin origins. On the left side appeared the “e” and on the right the “t,” and the stray letters were linked by a cradle that begins weightily, then thins out, with inky globular endings at each end of the crossbar on the “t.” Comme ça:

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The actual term did not appear until the early 19th century when “&” became the 27th letter of the English alphabet. The mark concluded the alphabet with “X, Y, Z, and per se and” with “and per se” meaning and and by itself. This final phrase was slurred and reborn as ampersand.

E.g. Gilbert & Sullivan, Jules et Jim, Mumford & Sons, Flammen & Citronen, Abbott & Costello, De rouille et d’os, Ben & Jerry, Bouchard Père & Fils, This & That, Proctor & Gamble (P&G), & a slew of law firms. Its shape has evolved continuously since being introduced, and while some ampersands are still manifestly e/t ligatures, others merely hint at their past, sometimes in oblique ways. Now, the ampersand is often sadly about that inane word “branding” & seemingly apt logos that are given so much bland thought.

CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES

1 C old-fashioned rolled oats
2 C all-purpose flour
1 t baking soda
1/4 t baking powder
1/2 t sea salt

2 sticks (16 T) nsalted butter, room temperature
1 C light brown sugar
1/2 C granulated sugar
2 large eggs

1 t vanilla extract

2 C bittersweet chocolate (70% cocoa) cut in 1″ pieces or semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat the oven to 350 F

To the bowl of a food processor fitted with a metal blade, add the rolled oats. Pulse the until most of the oats are somewhat ground, but they should not be ultra fine like flour. (In some respects, this is an optional move as many like the texture of full bore oats.) Add the pulsed oats to a large mixing bowl. Set a fine mesh sieve over the bowl, and add flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. Sift the flour mixture over the oats. Whisk the dry ingredients together.

To the bowl of a electric stand mixer fitted with a paddle attachment, add the butter, brown sugar, and granulated sugar. Beat the mixture on medium low until combined. Then, increase the speed to medium high and beat until airy and pale in color, about 2 minutes. Reduce the mixer speed to medium low again and add 2 eggs. Once the eggs are well incorporated, stop the mixer and use a rubber spatula to scrape down the bottom and sides of the bowl. Add the vanilla extract, then turn the mixer back on to medium low briefly to assure a good mix.

Then, reduce the mixer speed to low and add the flour & oat mixture until mostly combined. Turn off the mixer and remove the bowl. Add the chocolate chips and stir with a spoon until combined, scraping down the bottom and sides of the bowl throughout.

Use a large spoon to divide the cookie dough into pieces about the size of a rounded tablespoon, rolling the dough in your hands. Set the cookies about 2″ apart on a parchment paper lined, rimmed baking sheet and bake for 5-6 minutes. Rotate the baking sheet and bake until golden brown around the edges and still soft in the center, about 5-6 minutes longer. Many oven temperatures differ, so try not to overcook.

Remove the baking sheet from the oven and let the cookies cool there until set, about 5 minutes. Use a metal spatula to transfer the cookies to the wire rack to cool completely. Repeat with the remaining cookie dough. Then serve these delectable morsels and savor — whatever time of day or night.

That Perfectly Humble Soul (A Fried Egg)

What’s done cannot be undone.
~William Shakespeare, Macbeth

Eggs “up, sunny side up, with a skirt, basted, over easy, over light, flipped, dippy, runny, broken, over medium, stepped on, medium well, over hard, hard, done, over well, over cooked, nuked, dead“…an expectant diner’s heaven, but often a server’s and line cook’s hell. So many chefs and home cooks have dabbled with, have pondered and toiled over, have been bewildered and bullied by, and have sometimes finally mastered the divine fried egg.

The lipid of choice tends to set the stage whether unsalted butter, olive oil, canola oil, chicken fat, duck fat, goose fat, bacon fat or some other shared friend(s). But, the chosen mixes and methods for eggs, fat, heat, and timing tend to rule in the end.

While some consider them prosaic, when done right and softly savored, fried eggs are flat deific.

For me? Try frying one or two eggs at a time so your attention is focused on those brief moments that it takes to transform the critters. Melt a couple tablespoons of “fat” in a heavy, medium skillet over medium heat until it is gently foaming or just lightly shimmering. While the fat melts, crack fresh, local eggs into a glass cup or saucer then slide them into the foaming butter or shimmering oil. Cover with a clear domed lid and adjust the heat so that the butter does not brown, but is just hot enough that the white begins to set. Begin spooning the hot butter or oil over the eggs until the runny whites turn opaque and the yolks begin to set ever so slightly, but remain rather runny. (The white no longer clear and the yolk still loose.) Remove to a plate by simply sliding them out of the pan or use a slotted spatula. Season promptly with salt and pepper, and dine barefooted with a knowing smile.

Still, some disagree on the perfect technique. So because a fried eggs are rather personal by nature, a loosely wound decet (in no order of preference) follows.

FRIED EGG

1 fine egg, fresh and locally raised with a robust orangish yolk, at room temperature
Fat (unsalted butter, extra virgin olive or canola oil, poultry or pork fat)
Sea/kosher salt
Freshly ground black pepper
Herbs, if desired

(1) In a small, nonstick skillet, melt unsalted butter over moderate heat. Add the egg and fry, turning once, until crisp around the edges, about 4 minutes total. The yolk should just begin to set, but still be in a runny state. Cook longer should you so desire. Remove to a plate with a slotted spatula or spoon and season with salt and pepper.

(2) Bring 1/4 cup of olive oil to medium high heat in a heavy, sided, smaller sauté pan. Tip the pan at a steep angle, so that the oil collects in a small bath, and slide the egg into the hot oil from a glass cup. Spoon the oil over the egg. After about 30 seconds or so of cooking, the egg white forms a protective coating around the yolk without becoming attached to it. Once the egg develops a golden hue from the oil, remove to a plate with a slotted spoon and season with salt only.

(3) In a small skillet, heat olive oil over medium low heat. Meanwhile, crack the egg into a glass cup or saucer, and then add the egg and cook gently in the heated oil. Even consider cracking the egg into a cool pan, and allowing it to heat with the oil until soft and silky. Remove to a plate with a slotted spatula or spoon and season with salt and pepper.

(4) Crack the egg into a glass cup or saucer. Gently slip the egg into a well buttered medium, heavy pan which is on low heat. Fry the egg over low heat, with the butter allowed to foam rather than simply melt. Cover the pan for the duration of the cooking process, which results in a soft, but firm white, and a runny yolk. Remove to a plate with a slotted spatula or spoon and season with salt and pepper.

(5) Place a smaller, heavy nonstick frying pan over the lowest possible heat. Add unsalted butter and allow to slowly melt. When all the butter has melted but has yet to foam, swirl the pan to coat the skillet and then crack the egg into a small glass bowl or saucer. Gently slide the egg off the dish into the frying pan and cover with a lid. Continue cooking approximately 4-5 minutes until the egg white solidifies from transparency into snow white cream; the yolk will thicken slightly as it heats.

(6) Crack the egg into a glass cup or saucer and set aside. Heat unsalted butter in a heavy, smaller skillet over low heat. Once the butter has melted, but has yet begun to foam, swirl it around the pan to coat, then slide in the egg. Cover with a domed lid and cook until the white is set, about 3 1/2 minutes. Remove to a plate with a slotted spoon and season with salt and pepper.

(7) Heat unsalted butter in a heavy skillet over medium high heat. When foam subsides, reduce heat to low and break the egg into a glass cup or saucer. Slip in the egg and then add a sprinkling of water to the pan (not the eggs themselves). Cover and cook slowly until done. The steam will cook the whites over and around the yolks.

(8) Break the egg into a glass cup or saucer. Meanwhile, heat poultry fat (chicken, duck, or goose) in a heavy skillet over low heat. Once melted and before shimmering, slide in the egg. Cover with a lid and cook until the white is set, occasionally basting with the melted fat, about 3-4 minutes. Remove to a plate with a slotted spoon or spatula and season with salt and pepper.

(9) Heat canola oil in a heavy, smaller skillet over medium heat. Meanwhile, crack the egg into a glass cup or saucer. Once the oil is hot, slide in the egg. As it cooks, spoon hot oil over the egg whites. Towards the end of cooking, carefully pour a couple of spoonfuls of oil over the yolks. Cook to desired doneness. Remove to a plate and serve.

(10) Put a few bacon strips in a skillet. Start with the heat at medium high, but as the bacon begins to cook, reduce it to medium so the bacon does not burn. Cook the bacon slowly until it is slightly crisped on one side and then turn to cook slowly on the other side. When the bacon is done, remove the pan from the heat and transfer the bacon to a paper towel lined plate and tent loosely with foil. Allow the skillet to cool for several minutes before cooking the eggs. Pour off any excess bacon fat.

Break each egg into a small glass cup or saucer and then slip the egg into the warm bacon grease. Place the pan back over low heat and allow the eggs to cook slowly. When the egg whites begin to set, tip the pan and baste with some hot bacon fat to cook the yolks. Remove to a plate and serve.

Asynchronous Communication & Dates

It is better to be hated for what you are than to be loved for what you are not.
~André Gide

A brief obit on courtship.

One sad day, Dating, a longtime mate who has been fighting an insidious illness for a decade, quietly passed almost overnight. Her closest friends whispered that the cause was cancerous by nature. She had been a tireless advocate of couplings for centuries, merging innumerable sometimes seemingly mismatched relationships, many who went on to be life long partners and others who did not quite reach that supposed paradigm. She encouraged couples to address each other directly, to communicate face à face, and openly share interests and intimacies without codes, pretenses, online personas or flat screens. Dating would not have countenanced a couple strolling through the park, engaged only by their screens and not one another, texting whomever else about whatever. With Dating, sensuous trysts steeped in droll wit, mutual charm, eager eyes, seductive words, and even homey sociability were urged. Ever exploring one anothers’ minds and bodies, exalting each other’s uniqueness, while bearing blemishes and flaws over time, became the standards. That was soulful sychronicity in full bloom.

While not fully expected, others subverted the rules of courtship rather recently, sadly causing Dating’s descent and demise. The disease process spread more rapidly than expected. What with texting, e-mails, social media, smartphones, Twitter, Facebook, online dating sites, and instant messages, Dating stood little chance in her later years. Narcissitic texters, bizarre checklisters and flyspecking online data collectors, especially, would lead to her hastened departure. The now obsolete traditional dinner + movie was replaced by online liaisons, non-dates, hookups and hanging out in groups, small and large, sometimes known and more often unknown. Commitment free flings, screen only paramours, and ambiguous dalliances that leave both halves unhappy, sexually unfulfilled, and confused about intimacy have now become all too common. We lament that there were no simple solutions Dating could have offered nor that she could have proposed before her untimely end — other than to revert to the romantic days of yore. Without her, the courtship landscape may indeed prove bleak.

Oh, we will miss the furtive and lingering glances, flirtations, seductions, angst and joys of romance, madame Dating. So many of us still embrace you in your afterlife.

CHICKEN WITH DATES, FENNEL AND LEMON

4 chicken leg-thigh quarters
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
Ras al hanout
3 T extra virgin olive oil
1 T unsalted butter

1 medium onion, peeled and thinly sliced
1 medium fennel bulb, peeled and thinly sliced
4 plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and finely chopped
Hefty pinch of saffron threads, crumbled
1 T ras el hanout
2 cinnamon sticks

2 preserved lemons
1+ C chicken broth

1 1/2 C pitted dates
2 t ground cinnamon
3 T honey

Sesame seeds, toasted
Cilantro leaves, chopped

Season chicken with ras al hanout, salt and pepper. In a large, heavy skillet add the olive oil and butter over medium high heat. Sauté the chicken until browned, about 5 minutes per side, and set aside in a baking dish tented with foil. Then, add the onions, fennel, garlic, saffron, ras al hanout, and cinnamon sticks. Cook over medium to medium high heat for about 8 minutes. Add the chicken broth and lemons and increase the heat just to bring the liquid to a gentle boil and then promptly lower to a simmer. Cover and cook over medium heat, stirring occasionally, until the chicken is done and the sauce reduced some, about 20-25 minutes.

Meanwhile place the dates, cinnamon and honey in a heavy saucepan. Stir gently to combine, then simmer over medium heat until the dates are tender and the sauce is syrupy, about 5-10 minutes.

Spoon the dates and syrup over the chicken and friends, and then garnish first with sesame seeds and then cilantro.

Poireaux Vinaigrette (Leeks Vinaigrette)

Vinegar: that’s what fear smells like.
~Jennifer Egan

Tangy fine wine vinegars are aphrodisiacal…much like fear in today’s world.

From the French vin (wine) and aigre (sour). In the Middle Ages, alchemists poured vinegar onto lead in order to create lead acetate. Called “sugar of lead,” it was added to sour cider until it became clear that ingesting the sweetened cider proved deadly. By the Renaissance era, vinegar making was a lucrative trade in France, many of them infused with pepper, cloves, roses, fennel, herbs, raspberries, and the like.

The guild of vinaigriers (vinegar makers) received French royal recognition in the 14th century under Louis XII. The trade was centered on the town of Orléans, but the rue des Vinaigriers in Paris (near the fetching Canal St-Martin) suggests that there were vinaigriers in City of Light too. Today, one of the remaining traditional vinaigriers based in Orléans is Martin Pouret (founded in 1797).

In the making of vinegar, science and art merge, and like its alter ego, wine, vinegar is a subject of scrutiny by gourmands. The transformation of wine or fruit juice to vinegar is a chemical process in which ethyl alcohol undergoes partial oxidation that results in the formation of acetaldehyde which is later converted into acetic acid. Should you care, the chemical reaction flows something like this: CH 3 CH 2 OH=2HCH 3 CHO=CH 3 COOH.

I would heartily recommend maintaining a selection of vinegars in the pantry, with red wine vinegar as the central choice, but make room in the pantry for white wine, champagne, tarragon, apple cider, sherry, and balsamic vinegars (or the French take, banyuls).

This plate is a classic, but by no means should be considered antediluvian. More like primeval.

LEEKS VINAIGRETTE

8 small leeks
Sea salt

2 T Dijon mustard
2 T red wine vinegar
1 small shallot, peeled and finely minced
6 T extra virgin olive oil
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

1 T capers
12 cornichons
12 niçoise olives, pitted
2 eggs, hard boiled and halved lengthwise

Trim leeks, cutting off hairy roots, removing tough outer layers, and trimming off the tops while leaving some green. Make a lengthwise slit part way down each leek. Put leeks in a large glass bowl with cool running tap water and swish to remove any sand or dirt. Remove leeks and set aside on a towel.

Fill a pot with cold water and bring to a boil. Then, salt generously and drop in leeks. Reduce heat some and cook at a brisk simmer until leeks are tender when pierced with a paring knife, about 8-10 minutes. Drain in a colander and cool to room temperature, again on a towel.

Meanwhile whisk together mustard, wine vinegar and shallot in a bowl. Vigorously whisk in olive oil to emulsify and make a smooth sauce. Season with salt and pepper and whisk a little more. The vinaigrette should be fairly bright, and the mustard flavor should come through, but not too patently.

Arrange leeks on plates. Spoon vinaigrette over leeks and sprinkle with capers. If desired, garnish each plate with cornichons, olives, and eggs. And then “oh yeah, baby.”

A Return To Sanity — And Our Lambs

Love children especially, for they too are sinless like the angels; they live to soften and purify our hearts and, as it were, to guide us.
~Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

I must be fleeing from this distasteful inanity. With reason.

Over time, many have taken and considered various pragmatic stances, were accoutred with reasonable negotiating skills, took pride in remaining well-informed, displayed patience and equanimity, and stood by with a congenial, usually optimistic bend even in dark times. They sought resolution via compromise. This does not ever imply that they were blameless or free of criticism. Lamentably though, that species is becoming extinct in today’s political world now peopled by fanatical demagogues who care little for civility or progress — their extreme positions are so entrenched and illogically dogmatic that compromise is inconceivable. Those zealots, mired down by delusion and arrogance, hope and pray only to garner enough financial and electoral strength to claim that lowly office once more (and avoid being “primaried”). Government servants who avowedly detest government weary me.

Anyone in any trade, craft or business who had such dismal approval ratings would feel soulless and would be on the streets. Is that not metaphorical because are not some politicians really soulless beggars in a sense?

So, time for a recess from this dysfunctional, almost dismembered, institution called congressional politics and a return to the more rational worlds of food, culture, music, art, literature, history, and science. I may return some day, but your misguided mania has caused me and so many others to lose faith.

Before taking leave of you, I humbly beseech that each day when you are preening for your next feckless Congressional hearing, absurd appearance on the floor, perplexing press interview, or lunch with those sycophants called lobbyists (who profit from your dysfunction), ask yourself this simple question: “what am I doing for this country’s youth?”

We are talking basic issues which deeply affect our young citizenry and our nation’s future. So, just try to avoid political obfuscation, encourage political and intellectual honesty, help to avert mass shoootings, address the rampant spread of guns, confront and curtail the dreadful impacts of global warming, assuage broad environmental concerns, reduce the costs of higher education, encourage an expansion of college grants, address our overall primary and secondary educational needs, assure that our precious ones have universal health care, feed hungry households, devote fervent efforts to the food system debacle, undertake to reduce income disparity, cease homelessness in our youth, withdraw from needless wars, and drastically lessen influence peddling and money in politics. These are some of the concerns which do plague, and will soon jeopardize, the next generation.

You will be gone by the time these woes really come to roost, but since most children cannot vote, apparently you seem not to care enough to help ameliorate their present and future problems. A form of exploitation. Yet, I still implore you to each day, while you draw that comb through whatever gray or dyed hair remains, again ask yourself this simple question: “what am I doing for this country’s youth?” Until something is done in a concerted way on that surreal Hill, I fear you will sentence them to lives of doom.

For now, let’s return to the lambs — a kinder place with gentler pastures.

GRILLED LEG OF LAMB

1 C extra-virgin olive oil
1/2 C red wine or sherry vinegar
4 plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and minced
2 T fresh oregano leaves, finely chopped
1 T fresh thyme leaves, finely chopped
1 T fresh rosemary leaves, finely chopped
2 lemons, halved and juiced
2 T Dijon mustard
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

1 (4-5 lb) boneless leg of lamb, butterflied open

In a medium bowl, whisk together the olive oil, vinegar, garlic, oregano, thyme, rosemary, lemon juice, mustard, salt and pepper. Pat the lamb dry and lay in a large baking dish or on a platter, then season with salt and pepper. Pour the marinade over the lamb, turning the meat to coat well. Cover the dish with plastic wrap and place in the refrigerator for 4 hours or even overnight. Remove the marinated meat from the refrigerator about an hour before grilling so that it reaches room temperature.

Prepare coals for barbecuing. Roll 2-3 full newspaper sheets into tubes, then bend the tubes to form rings. Turn the chimney starter upside down. A grate splits the hollow inter­ior of the tub into two compartments. Fit the tubs into the base of the starter so that they are pressed against the grate. Be careful to leave a hole in the middle (the hole allows for airflow once the newspaper is lit).

Turn the chimney over so that it is right side up. Load the chimney to the top with charcoal. Using a long match or butane lighter, light the newspaper in several places through the holes at the bottom of the chimney starter. Wait 10–20 minutes for all the coals to light. The charcoal is ready when you see flames licking at the coals in the top of the chimney and gray ash just starting to form. Wearing an oven mitt, lift the chimney starter by the handle and slowly dump the hot coals in a pile onto the bottom coal grate in the middle of the grill, and put the starter in a safe place.

Once the briquets turn very hot, spread and place the top rack over them. The fire is medium-high when you can hold your hand about 3-4″ above the rack for 3 seconds or so before you must retract. Grill lamb, fat side down first, covered, for about 15 minutes. Turn meat and grill, covered, about 10 minutes more on the other side or until it reaches medium rare.

Before carving, let the lamb rest on a welled cutting board for at least 15-20 minutes to allow the juices to migrate throughout. If you carve too soon, the juices will simply exit the lamb leaving behind a much drier piece of meat. Slice the lamb across the grain and on the bias.

STUFFED LAMB SHOULDER

1 bunch Swiss chard, leaves and stems separated
2-3 shallots, peeled and finely sliced

1 carrot, peeled and finely chopped
1/2 turnip, peeled and finely chopped
1/4 C thyme leaves, finely chopped
1/4 C fresh parsley leaves, finely chopped
2 T fresh chives, finely chopped

1 (4 lb) boneless lamb shoulder
4 plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and halved
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
Extra virgin olive oil, for rubbing

1 (4 lb) boneless lamb shoulder
Extra virgin olive oil, for searing

4 C chicken stock
1 head garlic, cut in half transversely

2 T unsalted butter
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Prepare an ice water bath. Add chard leaves to the boiling water and cook for 1 minute. Using a slotted spoon, immediately transfer to the ice water. Cool, drain, squeeze out excess water and coarsely chop.

Heat olive oil in a large, heavvy skillet over medium heat. Add shallots and cook, stirring, and continue cooking about 2-3 minutes. Transfer chard-shallot mixture to a medium bowl and set aside.

In a medium bowl, mix together the carrots, turnips, parsley, chives, and chard-shallot mixture. Season with salt and pepper.

Preheat oven to 350 F

Spread the lamb open on work surface. Score the inside of the meat with a paring knife, making shallow incisions every 3/4″ while taking care not to cut all the way through the meat. Rub the opened shoulder on both sides with the halved garlic and season inside with salt and pepper. Then, spread the herb mixture over the surface, leaving a 1″ border. Carefully roll the lamb, tie with 5 or 6 pre-cut kitchen trussing strings at fairly close intervals. Brush with olive oil and season outside with salt and pepper.

In a large, heavy sauté or roasting pan, heat the olive oil on high. Add the lamb shoulder to the pan and briefly sear until browned on all faces, about 2 minutes per side. Remove from heat and then add the stock and garlic. Place in the oven for about 2 hours for medium rare to medium, or using an internal meat thermometer until it reads 155-160 F after resting. (Remember the meat’s internal temperature typically rises 5-10 degrees as it rests. So, remove lamb from cooking heat when the thermometer reads 5-10 degrees less than the ultimate desired temperature.)

Remove the lamb shoulder from the pan, place on a welled cutting board and tent with foil. Meanwhile, strain juices over a medium, heavy saucepan and cook on medium high until reduced by half, at least almost a silky sauce consistency. Remove from heat, whisk in the butter and season with salt and pepper. Remove strings, making sure you have allowed the lamb to stand 15-20 minutes before carving into larger slices for serving. Ladle sauce over sliced lamb shoulder on plates.

Ukiyo-e (Pictures of the Floating, or Sorrowful, World) & Latkes

Dew Evaporates
And all our world is dew…so dear,
So fresh, so fleeting.
~Issa

Ukiyo-e 浮世絵 is a stunning art form that conceives an evanescent world, a fleeting beauty divorced from the mundane — a genre of Japanese mass produced woodblock prints for commoners in the seclusive Edo period. The polychromatic images depict romantic vistas, transient tales, street scenes, kabuki motifs, comely courtesans, bawdy brothels and even shun-ga (erotica). Life’s momentary insights from shadows and dreams.

Each ukiyo-e image was a collaborative effort: a publisher who coordinated the artisans and marketed the works; an artist who plotted and inked the design on paper; a carver who meticulously chiseled the images, now pasted to a series of woodblocks; and a printer who applied pigments to the woodblocks and printed each color on exquisite handmade paper. Reproductions, sometimes numbering in the thousands, could be made until the carvings on the woodblocks became overly worn.

While a rambling discourse on beloved sushi or sashimi in earlier Japanese culture may seem in order, it is hanukkah so…

POTATO AND TURNIP LATKES

2 medium russet potatoes, peeled and shredded
1 large turnip, peeled, quartered and shredded
1/2 medium yellow onion, peeled, quartered and shredded

2 large eggs, lightly beaten
2 T all-purpose flour
1/2 T fresh thyme leaves, finely chopped
1/2 T fresh sage leaves, finely chopped
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper

3/4 C duck fat, plus more as needed

Place the vegetables in a strainer over a large bowl and allow liquid to drain. Set reserved liquid aside and allow starch to sink to the bottom. Gingerly pour liquid from the bowl, reserving the milky residue (potato starch) and discard the clearer, watery stuff. Transfer potatoes back to bowl with the starch.

Beat together the eggs, flour, thyme, sage, salt and pepper in another bowl until well combined. Add the egg mixture to the vegetables and mix until evenly combined.

Heat duck fat in a large, heavy skillet over medium high heat until shimmering.

Form some “silver dollar pancakes” and carefully place one in the hot fat to test for temperature — the fat should immediately bubble around the edges. Cook until golden brown, turning once, about 3-4 minutes per side. Remove them from the pan and taste, adjusting the seasoning as needed.

Form more potato patties and place them in the hot fat without overcrowding. Fry (undisturbed) until the latkes hold together and become golden brown, again about 3-4 minutes per side. Adjust seasoning to your taste. Remove to a paper towel lined platter and continue frying more latkes until done.

Nosh on them semi-hot or preferably closing in on room temp. If you are even a touch unfamiliar, you will wonder where in the hell these divine spuds have been for all these years.

Memory and…uh, um, Brussels Sprouts

Memory is the diary we all carry about with us.
~Oscar Wilde

Another long held food hypothesis thankfully proven lab sound: memory influences eating and food choices. Researchers at the University of Bristol explored the nexus between satiety and memory, and their findings were published in a recent issue of the journal PLoS (Public Library of Science). They isolated the extent to which memory for a recently consumed meal influences hunger and fullness over a 3 hour period — by covertly refilling or drawing soup from bowls while participants dined. A scientific trompe-l’œil of sorts.

The study noted that those who engage in distracting tasks (e.g., watching television or playing a computer game) while eating suffer memory impairment not only for that meal but also experience increased hunger in the interim and then enhanced consumption at their subsequent meal. They are not making memories of their food, and may be setting themselves up for munchies later. Distraction likely influences eating rate, mood, and level of stress, all known to moderate appetite and food intake. Ever see a svelte driver hurriedly munching on a midday burger while talking on an earpiece and anxiously navigating traffic between meetings?

While stopping short of drawing a cause-and-effect relationship between hunger and memory, the Bristol team’s research was consistent with emerging literature on “memory for recent eating” and opened avenues to further studies. Their observations did provide evidence that hippocampal memories often mobilize behavioral responses to food.

Seems like even more than a starter. Just try that terrifying act of shutting off the gadgets and sitting down to really savor your meal, not just once but more than…

FARFALLE, PANCETTA & BRUSSELS SPROUTS

Sea salt
8 ozs farfalle pasta

2 T extra virgin olive oil
3 ozs pancetta, cut into lardons
1 thyme sprig
1 rosemary sprig
6 plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and smashed
Freshly ground black pepper

1+ C brussels sprouts, thinly sliced on a mandoline
Sea salt and freshly ground red and black peppers
Chicken stock
1 T unsalted butter
Dollop of heavy whipping cream

Parmigiano-reggiano cheese, freshly grated
Extra virgin olive oil
Thyme sprigs

Heat large, heavy sauté pan over high heat and add the olive oil. When oil is hot and shimmering, add the pancetta thyme and rosemary, and sauté until the fat on the pancetta starts to turn translucent and just lightly brown, about 1 minute. Add the garlic and freshly ground black pepper to taste, and sauté until garlic and pancetta turn richly brown, about 3 minutes. Remove and discard garlic, thyme and rosemary.

Add the brussels sprouts, a large pinch of salt, peppers and a splash of stock to pan, and sauté until sprouts just start to soften, about 2 minutes. Spread sprouts mixture in pan and press down to flatten. Let it sear for a minute, then stir and repeat to lightly brown. Add the butter and cream, and sauté for about another couple of minutes or so.

Meanwhile, bring large pot generously salted water to a boil. Add the farfalle and cook until pasta is just al dente, about 10-11 minutes.

Drain fafalle and add to pan with brussels sprouts mixture. Cook briefly, tossing, until all is nicely admixed. Spoon into pasta bowls and top with a drizzle of olive oil and a sprinkling of parmigiano-reggiano and thyme sprigs.

Math + KFC (Yangnyeom Dak)

You know, you really can’t beat a household commodity — the ketchup bottle on the kitchen table.
~Adlai E. Stevenson

Now that the electorate has spoken, it seemed timely to remind some readers that the days of Ike, Adlai and the Cleavers were from a time long ago in a galaxy far, far away. Times of yore which best be forgotten, but still remembered some. For example, extensive tax cuts coupled with “just” wars and an expanded military complex were commonly known then to drastically reduce needed revenues, create deficits, and were proven inimical to the greater good of society. Surely some old white men recall those self evident truths (I do).

Gochujang (고추장) is a savory, subtly pungent, deep crimson Korean paste in which the essence of red chiles is balanced with the sweetness of glutinous rice, fermented soybeans and salt. It is believed to have been first served in Korea in the late 18th century, after chiles were earlier introduced there by European traders. In my humble, this mother condiment prevails hands down over commercial ketchup and should be embraced as a home staple. Salty and sweet, with an earthy finish and umami hints, beloved gochujang is sublime on the front end, in the middle or as a finish for many dishes. Perhaps the demographics on the table need to be reshuffled some to reflect the changing landscape.

This versatile, now nearly indispensable, paste can be stored for several months in the refrigerator. Simply bring to room temperature before using. Often, it is diluted with a touch of wine vinegar or some other coddler.

KOREAN FRIED CHICKEN (YANGNYEOM DAK)

8 chicken thighs
Sea salt

Canola oil, for frying

6 plump, fresh garlic cloves, peeled and minced
1 ginger, 1 1/2″ slice, peeled and minced
1 T light brown sugar
3 T soy sauce
3 T gojujang
1 1/2 T rice wine vinegar
1 T sesame oil
1 T honey

2 C all purpose flour
1/4 C cornstarch
1 C cold water

8-10 chicken thighs

Sesame seeds, toasted
Scallions, sliced thinly, lengthwise

Lightly sprinkle salt over the chicken in a large glass casserole, cover with plastic wrap, (or place in a sealable plastic bag) and leave them in the refrigerator for 4 hours or overnight. Remove the chicken from the fridge and use paper towels to remove as much moisture from the surface of the chicken as possible. Allow chicken to reach room temperature before frying.

Lightly toast sesame seeds in the broiler.

Pour oil into large, heavy Dutch oven to a 2″ depth, and heat over medium high heat until a thermometer reads 350 F. Meanwhile in a medium bowl, whisk together garlic, ginger, brown sugar, soy sauce, gojujang, rice vinegar, sesame oil, and honey. Set aside.


Whisk flour, cornstarch, and water together in another bowl until smooth and fairly thick. Add chicken and gently toss well. (Consider a dry batter as well.) Working in batches, fry chicken until lightly golden, about 6–8 minutes. Remove with a spider and drain on paper towels. Then return oil to 350 F and fry until crisp, about 2-3 minutes more. Remove and drain again.

Toss chicken in sauce to coat, sprinkle with toasted sesame seeds and serve with sliced scallions.

Pourboire: of course, being the mistress or master of your domain, you can use other chicken parts, such as wings or leg-thigh quarters — which does affect frying times some.